Active Time Battles! Crystals! Job Shift System! Bartz! THIS CAN ONLY BE FFV!

When we last left our heroes, they escaped the Ship Graveyard. Now, they search for civilization...



This looks like a good place to start.



Good news: this is extremely close to Walse.

Bad news: this is not Walse, nor does it have a crystal.





We nab some new equipment as well as some spells. Sleep can make monsters fall asleep. Silence prevents spells from being chanted, and is one of the two White Magic spells you can enchant your blade with. But how do you enchant your blade? Anyway, there's one more spell not shown: Protect, which raises your defense.




Fuck.



: We must stop it! How do we get to Walse?

: Walse is across the ocean. It's a quick trip by ship, but since the wind slowed, there aren't any ships sailing...

: Hrm...haven't got Syldra, either...



Nice job, Galuf, you made Faris cry! How can you live with yourself?!







...then we can go by air!

...that's it for today, folks. Next time: we climb a mountain! I am sure of it!

Why do I have the feeling that this is a reference to the Wizard of Oz? (It referenced Final Fantasy VII, I wouldn't put this above them.)

Also, in case you were wondering, the little white thing to the left is a hidden passageway, made possible by Thief!Faris. We went through there mainly to get 1000 gil.



I stocked up on Potions.



As well as sell some old stuff.



I'm running from every fight. You may be wondering why I'm doing this, as it denies me of sweet, delicious ABP. It'll make sense.



Apply Ether to these guys...



...and get a Blue Magic that Blinds all enemies! (fudged horribly, I know). It's called Flash. Sadly, however, you need to beat the enemies in order to get the Blue Magic. And I'm all out of Ethers.



I also can't win a battle, as that will make Lief level up. Yep, I need him to be at level 8.



*puts on fake mustache* DON'T STEP ON THE FLOWERS! No, really, don't. It will poison you. Every member of your party. Don't do it.



We'd be running from this guy even if we weren't avoiding level ups. Cockatrices can stone people, which is like death, except a Phoenix Down won't do. You'll need a Gold Needle.

Being turned to stone does, however, preserve your HP levels. I still don't like these guys.



Save point! We Tent up and save.

Which is good, because next is plot!



Le gasp! Is that...? Could it be...?!



Yep, it's King Tycoon's helmet. Sadly, we can't equip it. At all. I think.




Well fuck.






Well fuck.



Wind drakes are nearly extinct. Like the kakapo.  






Gonk is a word, evidently.



...what?



Fuck yeah!




Well fuck.



The script writers forgot an 's'? Faris is still boyish enough to pass as an effimate man? You decide!




"Hai!"




A good pirate always has a rope and stakes.

Also, this shows how   and badass Faris is.



Lenna, hang on!



We initiate battle with the wench!



Magissa, though a wild child, somehow is able to use magic.

She's level 8.

So is Lief.

Guess what?



That is about three quarters of her HP.  

If nobody is Level 8 to Goblin Punch her to death, she will summon her husband, Forza:

Unlike his magically-inclined wife, Forza is a physical attacker, through and through (he doesn't even have any Magic!). He can hurt with his Tackle attack (much bigger deal then it is in Pokémon, and it may or may not inflict Sap). He doesn't give any additional ABP (is there any way I can add stuff to Google Chrome's spell-checking dictionary?), and bosses as a rule drop no gil or EXP. His drop is an item which we'd find use for waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay later. Hence, we skip him.

This, of course, leaves a gap in our bestiary. But I don't give no damns 'bout that.






Galuf gains Barehanded, which allows him to punch stuff like a monk while not a monk.



Magissa drops a weapon that we can - currently - only use while we Freelance.



Lenna thanks Faris for being a badass.



As we defied Magissa's gimmick, we can resume fighting enemies. A set of three Gaelicats will give 2 ABP.  



!White 2. This means that, were she to change job classes, she can use all the White Magic we currently have. I think.

Everybody else also gains a character level. Levels all around!



Hiryu's hurt pretty bad.



The solution? Dragon grass.

Dragon grass is a special type of grass. While volatile to humans, it is akin to a nice super-elixir for dragons. This is the only main game dragon grass appears in, but it reappears in Final Fantasy Dimensions as a throwback to this game.

The problem?



It's surrounded by poison grass, in case you can't tell.

Lenna, however, is either not very bright, determined to save Hiryu, or both, because she poisons herself THRICE to get the dragon grass. She doesn't even cast Poisona or use an antidote! (Why would anybody not have Poisona? It's pretty cheap both MP and Gil wise.)

\

Faris feeds Hiryu the dragon grass.

Spoiler: Lenna will do something along this line again.



No matter how much you <3 Lenna, you gotta admit Galuf's right.



Hiryu then pokes Lenna.



Or works some dragony magic? I dunno. Maybe his dragoon subjobs as a White Mage?

Galuf tells everybody to "saddle up" ("get on the fucking dragon"), but:


Lief. You're at the top of a freaking mountain. You could've, oh, I dunno, mentioned that sooner.



Everybody laughs at it. Lief asks what they're laughing at.



Dammit, Galuf, I thought you were cool.



He has to push Lief on.



Hiryu is a flying-type method of transportation. He can fly over anything that's not a mountain. This includes the mountain he's currently on.  

Anyway, that's it for now! Possibly later today or tomorrow: we ABP grind a smidge, gain a Blue Magic that doesn't cost us an Ether, and get new jobs!

(yes I swear to god we'll get to it this update)



When we last left off, we got a freaking dragon to ride on.

As the Germans say, to Walse!



Like many proper kingdoms (Fabul is the exception), there's a town for Walse.



._.

We have to get the Kenpo Gis, no matter what. Why?



+1 to strength. This might not be as big of a deal in other games where you gain stats on level up and +1 (or more) strength is usually one where it matters, but in Final Fantasy V, where only a few select commands and abilities depend on level for damage, it's a blessing.



I also sell the whip as I won't Freelance any time soon.



No upgrades here.




Hm, odd. The magic spells sold here don't have circle things that dub them as Black or White Magic. Curi-ous. I nab Regen and Slow anyway.

Slow and Haste either slow down or speed up the target's ATB gauge. Regen has you gain HP over time. The FFIV DS incarnation of it in the Bardsong command was in particular useful because, as long as the singer wasn't attacked and there was nothing going on, one would regain HP equal to an nth of their total HP until the song was up. Mute is utterly worthless as it never works as it is bugged and when it does it's only on your party. If it worked, it would Silence all of the field.

Anyway, yeah.



Garulas are, indeed, encounters around the tower. They don't do anything until their 3rd turn, where they flee.

So. Plot.







Dude, you're kind of being a dick. Flipping the switch off won't cause the crystal's power to be nothing, and your people can work a little harder. This is bigger then the "entire world or card games" in Yu-Gi-Oh: Bonds Beyond Time because the entire world is card games. Here? The king's just being a dick and not wanting his people to work a bit harder.

Anyway, Lenna tells the king that the crystal will go .


Evidence 1: It is a crystal.
Evidence 2: It is enhanced by a machine like the Wind Crystal.
Evidence 3: One crystal is never the only crystal in danger. Ever.



Then do it silently.



Well fuck.





...



We must investigate!



After we mercilessly wait out 17 Garulas, of course.

Wait, what?



Y'know how Garulas flee every battle? Fleeing enemies give no EXP or gil, but still give ABP. Garulas give a total of 1 ABP. This'll take a while.



I also have Faris steal these from the Garulas. :B



Faris gains the passive ability Sprint, letting us walk even faster when I hold the B button. More useful in the SNES version.



Our Garula grinding is over, as what I set out to accomplish has been done: Lief levels up, and nets the !Blue ability.

For this next part, I slap Learning on everybody as, unlike Flash, there's no way to tell who the Blue Magic'll hit.



Also christ look at how much ABP Lief has to gain to master blue mage it's only a Libra knockoff

Seriously that's like 125 nut eater things/things that give 2 ABP and 50 things that give 5 ABP!



Where were we? Oh yeah, tower.



...fuck.



Yoink! Thanks, Faris.



*saves state*

Dat power.



Seriously that's, like, what, thrice his damage?

Yoinking mythril swords isn't what we're here for, however.




Nor is yoinking mythril knives (that is, however, useful). No, we aren't here to yoink anything at all.




This is what we are here for:

The power to turn enemies into Toads! POND'S CHORUS!

Very, very useful against the boss here. See, he's not resistant to Toad.



Garulas aren't resistant to Toad, evidently.

Also: the king doesn't die. Sadly.



Climb up the vines to proceed.




Timid? Yes. Weak? No.



This here is Garula. The boss. 1200 HP of hot, steamy, physical attacking goodness.



The problem about this is that they can be hit by Toad. Toads can't cast anything but Toad, and have the physical power of a pool noodle. The problem here is that Garula can cast Toad on itself, which makes Garula a not-toad (Toad-inflicting spells also remove Toad. Same with Mini.) The catch here is that it uses Garula's turn (it's not a counter), so it stalls its attacks.



This ends as well as you'd expect.



I configure my team to be like this: Galuf will do the majority of the hitting. Lief will make sure Garula's a toad. Lenna will be the healing whore. Faris will be a lesser healing whore, maybe getting in an attack or two if the going is somehow not too bad.

Seriously, this is the worst boss in the game. He can chain a few attacks, has no weaknesses, can inflict Sap, can hit hard, and can resist Galuf's punches.



Garula forgot to de-Toad himself. Either a fluke in the programming or I Toaded him after he entered his theoretical commands.

I ain't complaining.

...there was also a "No effect" message that popped up. I think it was Rush.

Woo!



Average damage when Galuf Focuses. Always. Focus. On. Bosses.

I also think I found out the "fluke": see, Garula chains attacks on counters. I did something that made him counter while he was Toaded; therefore, counter > Toad and he unleashed a counter chain on me.



Yes. Yes yes yes. He used Toad and it didn't work. Hell yes.

Oh yeah, Toad sometimes won't work, even if used for restorative properties. I was surprised about this too when I played FFV via iOS, my first encounter with this behaviour.



Woo!



What the deuce, Magissa was worth more ABP then this and she could be cheesed! I mean, Garula could be cheesed too, but you'd have to know that using a rod as an item would cast the corresponding -aga spell, as well as where to find the rod.



!White 3, which is ironic, given what's coming up next.



Raise your hand if you didn't see this coming.



The guard guy also knows Galuf, and he addressed him with the title of 'lord'. Put 'choor tinfoil hats on now, folks.

The knight tells us to protect the fire crystal. And that he was sorry for failing to protect the water crystal.



Time Mages (translated once as Dimension Mages; I don't know which translation that was but it actually fits the job better; maybe "Timespace Mages"?) control the flow of time and (sometimes) space. Dialga and Palkia hopefully approve. They use spells like Haste and Slow (duh) and Regen and Mute. They can also half/quarter enemy HP with Gravity-type spells and summon meteors.



Berserkers are mostly fucking useless. They have no job command, but have the passive Auto: Berserk, making them always attack with a boost. They have a pretty nifty boost to strength and vitality, though, and require 200 ABP less then Monks to master (700 vs. 500), so maybe, just maybe, they have a purpose.

also Lenna why the christ are you wearing that you shouldn't even be a Berserker


Red Mages are, well, Red Mages. They can cast up to level 3 black and white magic. While this sounds weak, that's actually half of those two schools of magic. One may be glad they only use three levels, because their last ability costs 999 ABP to learn. But damn is it worth it.



Dammit, why.



Summoners are the closest thing you'll get to an advanced job this game. They boast an awesome Magic score (+33) and can summon Eidolons to hurt stuff. HOWEVER, besides the summons in Walse (Remora, Chocobo, and Sylph) and a summon we'll get to later, you have to go out of your way to get Eidolons.



Heck yeah.

Mystic Knights enchant their blade with learned spells (usually Black Magic, but they can wield Silence Blade and Holy Blade). They require MP, but it's so trivial that you might not even notice. They also have Magic Shell/SOS: Shell which sets up Shell when your HP gets low. Meh.



If you look close enough, you'll see Lief moved a few pixels to the right.

That's right, the tower is shaking.



Well, sinking. Fuck.



The game's kind of a dick, reminding us that there's still one crystal shard left.





Seriously, that was only to remind us "Hey, there's still a crystal shard left. Ha-ha." We could've just as easily watched the tower sink and see our heroes being swept into the currents right after we got that last shard.



Deus ex Syldra saves the day!

And yes, s/he is sucking them in. I dunno.



Faris saves Lenna. How :3

Faris also expresses relief that Syldra's alive. How does she talk underwater? Blitzball ace? Extreme pirate training? You decide!





Like how Tellah snuffs it but more benevolent.



After Faris is in denial, Syldra exits stage up. S/he's definitely one of the more "cardboard" characters, although as s/he's a giant dragon and this is a sprite-based game with a pretty large amount of sprites I can see the spriters calling it quits eventually.



Glad to see Hiryu remembered to fly.

Anyway, next time: we sidequest! Stay tuned!

Also, as for my party configuration with the new jobs:



If anybody has some job ideas for Galuf and/or Faris, let me know. Lenna's Red Maging for their final ability, but may do summoner later for the massive magic bonus. I'm definitely having her be more of a "support" unit though, with White Mage and Timespace Mage getting under her belt. Galuf will do summoner later. Summoner monk, woo!

(He first must perfect the monk arts before he summons eidolons, however.)

When we last left our heroes, they watched a crystal shatter and got new jobs. Something I just realized is, sans Berserker, all of them could be considered magical jobs (or at least give a boost to magic). Lenna is a magic-y person. Lenna's element is water.


Anyway, we walk back to Walse to get some delicious ABP.



You have yourself to blame, you know. :I




We need this juicy bit of info to progress with the plot.



Shiva is an eidolon. One that we'll get to later.






Yoink!



Despite what this guy says, you can get Shiva before the water crystal breaks. But it would be hard, as you can't enchant your blade with Fire/Fira, and even if you do win, you can't summon her.



This is a fact, as you'll miss out on a piece of treasure.



While walking back to Hiryu to get back to Carwen to get spells, Galuf job levels up and gets this. Chakra increases Galuf's life energy, restoring HP and purging Poison. It also removes Blind, but I don't think that's for any other reason then because Blind hinders the hurting ability of Monks.

Unlike Sabin's technique (spoiler: Sabin learns Chakra), it affects and can only affect the user.



While fucking around trying to get to Carwen, Lief achieved level 1 in Mystic Knight. Unlike the other jobs that use a level-based ability, leveling up as a Mystic Knight (called Sorceror in what I believe is the PSX translation as that fucks the translation a lot) will first net you Magic Shell, probably because an automatic Shell at low HP was about as underwhelming for a final technique as Libra.



This is what happens when you try to buy a spell you already have.




The Frost Rod enhances ice-type spells. It can also sometimes cast Blizzaga on hit, but then you'd need to attack with a rod.

It's also key to cheesing the Garula fight. Slap this on Lenna and use it as an item. It breaks, but not before unleashing a level 5 spell - Blizzaga. It may or may not kill him, but it will certainly make it easier for your attackers to kill.

I pass, however, as we're about to get something that will increase Lenna's magical prowess.



This is the world map, by the by, accessed by hitting R. A lot less useful then, say, the map of FFI or Sight in FFIV where you could search for the location you wanted (and, in FFIV PSP, it overlayed a map onto the field screen).



Tycoon castle.



: I don't know you.
:onguard:: I was talking to the princess, wiseass.
: Oh.



There is never a chancellor that is cool. Fact.  



See what I mean? We, of course, take none of this, as Lenna's our healer.

We do, however, stay the night, where...!













She's a pirate. She could've just jacked it off of Lenna's real older sister. However, we know that this is most likely not the case, as Faris was confused about it too when she first met the crew, way back it chapter 2 part 3. I think.

Also why the fuck are you going into Lenna's room.

The next day, we meet the chancellor. We nab some treasure:




(missed: Shuriken)

We also get a very special staff.



You bet we can, bitch.



While it doesn't tell you directly, we got the Healing Staff! Why would I use it, you may ask, if it knocks down Lenna's attack to 0? Well, it raises Magic by 2.

But what's the point of a weapon that can't hurt stuff? you may ask.

It's not a weapon.

You hit stuff with it.

Cura is cast on it.

It also gives +2 magic, which amplifies the Hit: Cura effect.

This is my Lenna's weapon.



We also go to Tule.



I make Lenna be at the front of the party.



For this.




I don't know what the fuck they're doing, but instead of it happening to Lief it's happening to Lenna.  



She seems to be enjoying herself, however.



The dancers are still spinning in place. I switch back to Bartz as the lead.



Each time Bartz plays a piano, he gets progressively better, and his piano skills level up. It is therefore impossible to do a 100% complete low-level run of Final Fantasy V.

So...I might do an additional update tonight, to battle Shiva. No gurantees though, as I only have Fire. Yes or no?

When we last left off, we got ready to proceed with PLOT!




Lief warps. The party follows.



...where the heck are we?


A random encounter nets us this. ??? (pronounced "Lifebreak") is a dick and won't tell us what it does - it deals damage equal to the difference between your current HP and your Max HP. It costs 1 more MP then though, which is similar but has the better effect of restoring HP.   (and/or  )



Then again, who needs any healing technique when you have Lenna wielding a Healing Staff?

(Even with "Remember" turned on for the cursor, it still defaults to the enemy for targeting. )



This is our destination - Karnak.



The magic shop is closed, so we can't get Fira.



But look at those prices! :ooo:I'll take a mythril armor and four silver plates and a mythril shield and -



Well.

Fuck.




If you haven't played this game/read an LP of this game before you'd probably be thinking this too.

: They're with the monsters! We saw you all crawl from the meteorite - don't try to deny it!

...do we look like monsters? And even if we did, did you see us beating up the monsters?

: But we didn't crawl from the meteorite, we walked out of it!



The guards don't care they love it...oh god why as they drag our heroes away, the screen fading to black...



Well this ain't good.

: Hey, if we're stuck in jail, can I at least have a harmonica or something?

:onguard: : No!

: Jerkass.

After a few minutes of not playing the harmonica, however, something happens.

I believe the proper term is "WTF


BOOM"



: My great escape, and it's into another cell! That's the last of my explosives, too...nuts!

: Hey, do you have a harmonica?

: Sorry, kid. I used mine to help in the explosives.

: Nuts.



Everyone laughs at the old man for...some reason. Maybe because they thought that he should've known there was a cell on that side of his?



Yep.

*the party shakes their head*

: Ehh, doesn't matter. The name's Cid.

In case you didn't know, a Cid appears in all Final Fantasy games sans the first, and even then, in remakes of the first people in one town mention a guy named Cid built the airship. They're usually mechanical minded older fellows (except for FFVIII Cid. He's the worst Cid).

and yes he has a portrait but for some reason the Final Fantasy Wiki doesn't have it and I can't be arsed to make it/look for one



Lenna, you don't tell a Cid his machine is terrible.




Good Lenna.

: No, you don't have to apologize. It's the truth, after all. I'm to blame for everything...

Dammit, Cid, you're supposed to stand up for your creations!

Then again, they are breaking the foundations of the universe. Oops...?

He then explains how and why he made the machines. He found a tome explaining that the crystals used to have more power. To bring them back up to that awesome power, he made the machines. Somehow, it caused them to shatter.



: I was too late to save the crystals in Tycoon and Walse...Figured I could at least save the one in Karnak. But when I tried to switch off the machine, they threw me in here.



No, you got thrown in here because you were suspected of being monsters.

: You're here to protect the crystal?




Darn it, Lief, what did I tell you about showing off the source of your power?

: What?! A crystal shard...Who are you people?!

Except


The chancellor rushes in, telling Cid that he was right and stuff.

We're supposed to help him, but the magic shop is open.



That means we can get the Fira spell, allowing Lenna to use Fira and Lief to enchant his blade with it.

(And Cura, don't forget Cura.)

Intermission, so that you can absorb all that ploty goodness...

While more pricey now, we still get the armor.

(Fun fact: the first good you get is free. While in theory you could get the priciest item and then sell it, it's not really worth it.)



Random status ailment time! Old gradually decreases all of someone's stats to 1 (except for level). On monsters it just decreases speed and level (and magic attack). You can slap the status ailment on enemies via the Time Magic Old and Level 2 Old, a Blue Magic. (Level x spells hit targets that have a level equal to the multiple of x 100% of the time.) When your guys are afflicted with it, their hair turns gray.

Also, you may notice Lief is a Berserker. Despite the fact that they are useless, they do have some pretty nifty stat boosts for a pretty low ABP price (compared to some other jobs, anyway *cough*Monk*cough*). Sadly, their uselessness against bosses makes it hard to level it up. A trait I observed is that Lief's ATB gauge is always full to the naked eye, but it still needs to charge. Also, due to Berserker physics, there are three  sprite frames you will never see. Ever.

Also, despite being always , a berserker can still block with a shield if s/he has one.



I am quite afraid I'll have to hit you on the head with a frying pan if you don't know who got this and what it does.



Grass tortoises obviously have high defense. This is a regular attack from Galuf. If Lief is stupid and hits a back row Tortoise, then he might just even do 0 damage (as the only weapon I have now that's berserker-compatible is Lenna's knife because berserkers are too stupid to swing around swords).



I'm also showing you why I'd want Lief to master Berserker: look at that HP. Max HP is determined by a formula involving Stamina (not including any gains from equipment) and level (fun fact: the highest amount of HP you have without using Stamina enhancers is 3950 at level 99), and Berserkers have the second third highest Stamina bonus in the game, beaten only by Monks and an Advance-exclusive job. We'll take it.

(The highest amount of HP, in case you were wondering, is technically 10615.635, boasted by a Monkified Galuf. However, the game is mean and only lets us have 9999 HP.)



Also, despite wielding Lenna's starting knife, Lief can still slap some decent damage around. This is, like, what, 20 points less then one of Galuf's attacks?



So anyway, we ignore the crisis at hand and go to Karnak.




First, we get Lief an ax so he can kill random encounters better.

Curiously, you notice that his weight doesn't change. Then again, he is pretty bogged down already, so I won't complain, but don't you think that an ax would weigh more then a knife? Then again, taking off a weapon doesn't change the weight value either. Hm.



Then we get in the water in Walse Castle...



...to get to this waterfall tower thing...



...that brings us into the tower...



...which, after beating up random encounters and gaining job levels (guess who this is)...



...inexplicably having Lief block stuff with his shield...



...we get who we came here for: the ice Eidolon, Shiva.

: I am Shiva, the ice goddess...If you would command me, first you must prove your worth!



Shiva summons some of her own helpers, then the fight begins!

Ice Commanders can slap people with their swords (and use the skill "Critical Attack, seen here), but aren't too deadly, having only 600 HP. Shiva is more of a problem, boasting 1500 HP, and being able to Blizzara a whole row (for us, either Lenna or Lief, Galuf, and Faris) and following up with a Blizzard on one person. According to the FF Wiki, this'll do ~90 damage for Blizzara and ~200 damage for Blizzard, but it also says Shiva has 0 magic and 40 strength.



Cura is helpful in this fight.

It goes like one would expect: Galuf punches, Faris shanks, Lenna cures and sometimes Firas, and Lief axes whoever he damn well pleases to. (Seriously.)



Except...halfway through the battle...Faris dies. Guess who forgot to nab phoenix downs?  

And Lenna's out of MP.



Lenna then dies from a Blizzara+Critical Attack one-two punch.  



Then Galuf dies from Blizzara. (I think the FF Wiki lied to me; I think it's a single target Blizzara or a row-targeting Blizzara.)



The result is obvious.



So I pull out my save state and Mystic Knight-ify Lief and apply an ether to Lenna. Even if we didn't pick up Fira and only Cura, we'd still want Lenna to have as much MP as possible. Full party healing is good.

We start off this time with Lief enchanting his blade with Fira.



This wrecks the Ice Commanders' shit pretty good. That's like 4/5ths of their HP!



Before I could get a Cura or some other similar spell off on Lenna, though, she dies because of a Critical
Attack.



Faris soon joins her supposed sister in the afterlife.

And I could've stolen a phoenix down off of Shiva, too.



Galuf soon joins them.


It goes about as well as you'd expect, although I discovered that I had 3 Phoenix Downs when I tried to Potion Lief.  



Third time's the charm!

(Perhaps one of my biggest annoyances in this game is that, for !Red, there's a gap between the White and the Black Magic, making switching between them hard.)



After a bit, though, we kill all the Ice Commanders and get Shiva to ourselves.

...wait



Fira Blade is effective against Shiva.



Galuf's fists are too, but to a lesser extent. (Remember, this damage is usually effectively doubled.)


:banhammer:
Eventually, we claim victory, with everybody getting

WHAT          

C'mon, Magissa gave more then that! Granted, it was expected you were going to face her husband, but Shiva had three other mooks to knock down! THREE! OTHER! MOOKS!

I mean, yeah, we get the ability to call upon Shiva, but still!



...this makes up for it, though. Given whose coming up next, this is welcome.



okay, summoned monsters aren't actually called eidolons in this game. however, they're called the FFV incarnations are called that in dissidia, and it would be kind of weird just calling them summoned monsters, so

Okay, so that's where we'll leave off for today! Next time: more magics, more jobs, and more foodstuffs!

Maybe.

We start off this update in the basement of Walse Castle. This is a very special location. Why?



There are encounters here, and every one of them is with this fucker. 666 HP, with 50 in every stat, and it absorbs everything. (Except Water damage. Hm.) If you somehow manage to beat them (usually with the Level 5 Death spell), as a massive kick in the nuts, they only drop 1 gil. No EXP. No ABP. (And sometimes a Phoenix Down.) On the upside, at least, Faris can yoink Elixirs from them.

Flee every chance you get. There's a good reason why an NPC says that if you encounter jackanapes, you're up a creek.



Something along these lines will happen. Looks like I'm not getting any Elixirs. (I'll be back, though. Call me crazy.)



Speed is utter crap, slowing the battle down a bit (it sets the battle speed to 5, and I have it set to 1). In the iOS version, I encountered something peculiar that might involve usage of the spell: when it hit someone's turn, time stopped for a bit, letting you choose someone's command. Mulling over it too long would cause time to start again. Hm.

2000 gil is nice, though.



Notice that Lief survived a Jackanape attack. He's that loaded up on equipment.



Sadly, however, they didn't escape quick enough/Lief didn't go berserk enough to knock out 666 HP.

I load my save state (after the battle with Shiva . 3 .) and try again. I'm nabbing Speed because the Time spell list would look weird without it.




This. This is why you endure jackanapes. This makes it all worth it. It drops Lenna's defense by 2, yes, but it increases her magic even more even if it is only by 1 and it increases her agility and lowers her weight which, according to some guy, affects where the ATB gauge starts out. And it sometimes evades physical attacks (I believe a check to see if it works goes before the evade stat is applied). Fucking worth it.



After another Jackanapial wipe (I save stated - this and the Shiva fight are the only times I feel like I need to save state), I eventually say "why the fuck not" and slot in the !Flee ability for Faris. (As a note, Jackanapes do have a Blue Magic to learn, which makes the party mimic Lief and go all , except with fists and knives and Healing Staves. Needless to say, it's pretty useless until we get a new toy for Lenna that gives a better boost to Magic.



You're rarely going to see it, so have Berserk!Lief's weakened sprite and a KO'ed Galuf.



Fast-forward to Karnak, outside of the Fire-powered ship. Not seen: me purchasing the rest of the level 3 spells I can, rounding out my Potion supply, and taking a nap at the inn.



Hey, some of us were busy making sexy ice eidolons our slaves and getting magic spells.

: Just as I suspected - the ship's engine is what's draining the crystal's power.

Turn it off. Jesus, who leaves their engine on all the time? It certainly doesn't need it when it's docked.

: The engine?

Yes Lief, the engine. Not all ships have the benefit of being driven by .

: Yes. If the engine isn't stopped - and quickly - the fire crystal will shatter. Will you go?

Is it bad if I'm kinda reluctant? I mean, if the crystal shatters, we'll get more jobs. In fact, we're getting some game-breaky jobs.

*everyone nods*

At least they didn't give us the illusion of choice.



Of course it is. Thankfully, no jackanapes.



The first room is really simple.



So is the second.



The third, not so much. The thing with a triangle on it is a door, by the by.



Crew dusts are pathetic. They do have a Sap attack, however, which inflicts damage and, you guessed it, Sap, which is currently on Lenna. It quickly drains HP, at a rate of 1 HP/however fast it takes for the HP bar to change. They also use Flash.



In the door is this! Which is useless, given we already have one for Lief, who is the only one who will ever use one.



Going down the stairs nets us this. A Cottage restores all HP and MP to the party on a save point, as opposed to Tents, which restore 1000 HP and 100 MP.



As you can see, I went and got Flash. Sadly, only the person who doesn't need physical attacks had it miss. (Galuf doesn't have the sunglasses because he has his command window open. Weird glitch bug thingy.)



In the topmost door is an elevator thingy. Flipping the switch lets you move.



Yoink.



A room to the north lets us descend to a different lower floor.



Where we find out the conveyor belts are conspiring against us.

Also, as a note: this is the only way, for a while, to get some of the stuff that resides in the Fire-Powered Ship (including 3 (!) Elixirs).



Poltergeists are undeads, fall to Lenna, and have Lick which is basically a glorified Attack. Defeaters hurt stuff. They're special, though. Fall them last in battle...



...and two Motor Traps fall down. They're the source of the Blue Magic Self-Destruct (along with, who'd a thunk it, Bombs). They either use it on their own...



...or with a little provoking.



Self-Destruct (TM) either kills the user or removes him/her from battle (like dying, but you can only be revived after the battle), but inflicts damage equal to your current health (therefore, Lief and Galuf would get the most mileage out of it, Faris some, but not a ton, and Lenna just sucks with it.) Meh. Curiously enough, without provocation, Motor Traps will Self-Destruct when they get low on HP. I'd say nuke 'em and be done with it. At least you get 250 damage on 'em.

Also, Motor Traps were translated as Mottletraps in the PSX version, while Self-Destruct was known as Explorer. It says something about the translation if a fan translation did better then the actual translators.

Also, Lief and Faris are glowing red because the traps inflicted Stop on them via Gamma Ray. I hope you know what that does.



Chutes and ladders elevators later, we arrive here. Choose a path!



Door #2 reminds us the conveyor belts are conspiring against us.



However, after wondering around the chutes, we pick this up and take advantage of the conveyor belt conspiracy.



The Green Beret gives +1 boosts to strength and agility, in addition to being a point of defense better then the feathered hat. Also, fun fact: we're in the bulkhead.



Door #3 is just a dick.



Entering the chutes will drop you down to conveyor belt utopia. Unlike door #3...



...chute #3 isn't a dick.



While anyone can steal, thieves will always be the best at it, due to these. well freelancers too but Adding one to our agility, decreasing our weight, and giving two more defense is also good. With these, we now have a 80% chance to steal Elixirs from Jackanapes! ...I think.



Chute 4 dropped us off in about the same location as Door #2. Jerk.



Chute #2 drops us off at where we need to proceed, but there's stairs and treasure (shown: treasure).



The Moonring Blade is an upgrade for Faris. 35 attack is pretty good (12 more then Lief, but axes either take into account either 1/4 or leave out 1/4 of defense, I can't remember). Being a throwing weapon, it also allows Faris to hang in the back row with Lenna while being able to slap around stuff like the guys. (Being in the back row lessens damage received and dealt, unless using long range weapons.)

Chute #1 just takes us back to where we started this.



We rest in a tent (how do we lose those, anyway?), and save the game.

This is also where we'll be wrapping it up for today! Next time: puzzle-type thing, and the boss!

When we last left off, we were two rooms or so away from the boss. Now, puzzle room and boss!



We flip this switch here to go up...



After some switch flicking, we end up here. Getting on the platform and flicking the switch takes us back to the start.



Flick this switch



grab the treasure, and go through the door.

Huh, that wasn't nearly as painful as I remember it. Or puzzly.



Queen Karnak is the boss. Not in her current form, oh no.



We fight against...THE LIQUID FLAME!

(As a note, I realized Lief was a Berserker and threw the battle. This made me somehow lose out on the Elixir.)

She has three forms, which she switches between after she's been attacked. The first is her human form, which Rushes people. When she shifts out of that form, she uses Blaze, which hits everybody for fire element damage.



Her second form is the hand form. It actually ABSORBS ice damage instead of being weak to it. It uses Ray, which damages and paralyzes. When shifting out of it, she uses Fira on one person.



Her third form is her tornado form. This is her healing form; she hits herself with Fira to heal herself. When shifting out of it, she uses Magnet, switching somebody's row.



As a note, Blizzara and Blizzara Blade work wonders on it.

When not in hand form, that is.



After enough Firas, she'll actually run out of MP! As far as I know, this only affects her healing ability and the Fira counters.



...or not.

(It actually took another Fira or two in order for it to register. Game )



Friggin' finally.



Hey, something for Ygro! Too bad he's not in this world.

After the battle, Karnak tells us to protect the crystal. It's in the pipe.

So we will. Next time.

Last time, we killed some liquid flame that may or may not be the queen (God save her). Today, we confront one of the more  y parts of the game!





Whew, it's alright.



That's what I said.



Jesus, what's with all the people who know Galuf?



Lief, he knows Galuf. He probably sounded glad to see him.



...that.

Lief denies it. Jesus, the kid's thick. Wolfman asks Galuf if something is wrong, Galuf asks if he knows him, has an amnesia attack, then...



...a soldier comes in and turns on the machine. Wolfman questions the soldier's sanity, who is revealed to be possessed, then...



...he tries to stop the machine from fully setting in or something. He fails.

The fire crystal blows up, and...



...we gotta get out of the castle (?) in ten minutes. Including looting.

I'm just gonna show you the treasure:



Missed: Elixir from a monster-in-a-box. Yeah, I was kinda rushing myself.



Before you're home free, however, there's an encounter with these guys. They show up as random encounters, giving the gift of 3 ABP (which is why Lief is berserking) However...



...he's no ordinary soldier.



He has a special technique, Death Claw, which paralyzes an enemy and brings them down to single-digit HP. He's nice enough to teach it to someone with the Learning ability, too! :D

This is...pretty much the only thing worth noting about him.



He also gives EXP and gil, although it's more from the Cu Naks (the wolf things) then him.

He can also drop Silver Specs, which protect against Blind.



The castle proceeds to BLOW THE FUCK UP



We also get new jobs!

Beastmasters dress like sheep. Their innate Job ability allows them to catch monsters in critical health and then release them to use a special ability. However, what most people use Beastmasters for is their second level ability: controlling monsters. Instead of getting a turn, the Beastmasters use their turn to use a monster's ability, making learning Blue Magics a lot easier, and is the only way to get support ones.

They can also equip whips, which

Geomancers can use the terrain to attack. And use bells. Guess which one is more useful. (Hint: it's the one where they use the terrain.) They also have some decent support abilities (walking over lava and avoiding pits), and cost the least amount of ABP to master. (The only stat that they're good at is Magic, which they get a +24 for. The passives are useful, though.)

Ninjas can throw stuff, including shurikens (duh) and scrolls (which do magic damage). They can also dual-wield ninja swords, create mirages, escape from battle instantly, and increase the chances of getting a preemptive strike.

Faris will learn how to geomance, Galuf will learn how to tame animals, and Lief will be all ninja-like. Lenna needs to stick with Red Maging.

So, that's all for today. Next time: stuffs!

Also, I had Galuf gain a job level.


He can now Counter stuff while not a monk.